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Re-entry Student GraduateWelcome to our online student discussion forums! This is the place to ask a question about returning to college, share information with other returning students, or just join in the discussion!

For frequently asked questions about returning to college and getting started, please see the Website FAQ. No advertising, promotions, and posting of URLS, please. For additional questions about the use of the discussion forums and forum etiquette, see the Forum FAQ.

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#105 - 02/20/2002 17:48 PM FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

Hi everyone,
I am a divorced mother of two boys ages 12 & 8. I am 33 yrs. old and made the decision to go to college. I really need to do this for myself and my children. I have limited skills as I didn't work to my full potential in high school and I am tired of working my fingers to the bone for little to no pay. I am just terrified that I won't be able to "fit in" on campus. Also that I will fail. eek I just needed to vent this and to see if anyone can relate and give some advice or words of encouragment.
Thanks. :)

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#106 - 02/20/2002 17:59 PM Re: FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

I am 28 and the stay at home mom of 2 girls 2 and 4. I am returning to school after being out for about 5 years. It scares me that I won't finish again, but my attitude is that if I'm motivated to do it then I will. When I went to school before, I didn't care and wasted my time. Now, I want this and am not about to waste time or money! About the not fitting in...if you do, great and if you don't ..who cares! You have a full life out of school, so just go to class and do your best for yourself and your kids and don't worry about anyone else. Good Luck!

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#107 - 02/24/2002 06:06 AM Re: FEAR
Soapie0 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 02/24/2002
Loc: Deep South
I understand! I'm there, too! I'm 26 and have been out of school for almost 7 years. I'm married and have a three year old daughter. Going back to school scares me. I look very young, so I'm afraid people will think I just "fit in" and then when they find out I'm a settled family girl, they're going to think I'm a freak or something. I'm also afraid I won't be able to keep up with the learning.

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#108 - 02/24/2002 10:09 AM Re: FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

Relax. I went back at 39. There are plenty of older students going back to college today. You might consider taking a study skills or time management refresher course to get back into things and find a support network. Also, don't take too many courses at once - ease your way back in.

Starting something new is often scary. But you are not alone and others have gone before you. Go for it. :)

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#109 - 03/10/2002 08:51 AM Re: FEAR
timmyq45 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 03/10/2002
Loc: bay area
when i went back to school 10 years ago (in my 30's) I thought I would be the old man. What I found was that in some classes I was the youngest student. Alot of schools have a student success class which I highly recommend. This will help you to balance your life and still do well in school. Why I am here? Decided to do the Masters thing. I currently teach at a technical college.

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#110 - 03/31/2002 10:11 AM Re: FEAR
thejavagod Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 03/31/2002
Loc: los angeles, ca
I'm 28, work full time and goto school fulltime (15 credits), although its true that I do not have kids. However, "fitting in" has never been a problem as there are students of all ages including tons of students between late 20s to late 30s. This is especially true for evening/night classes. Remember, learning is a lifelong process, not something that ends when you turn 22.

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#111 - 04/24/2002 07:56 AM Re: FEAR
Maya Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 04/24/2002
Loc: Seattle
Hello peeps,

Don't worry about fitting in! Age is only an issue in college because of outdated mindsets. The reality is all people who go to college have at least two or three things in common, namely education and/or self-actualization or whatever.

Fear is a great topic! I know for me, the first time I went to college, well it was bittersweet. I dropped out and am returning at 26.

How I deal with my fears or self-doubt is to exercise, make a contact or two in each class I take, speak with my instructors so they know what I am about, keep a journal (for time management and unwanted feelings)and most importantly...have fun!

When I first went back I thought my age made me a failure. Yet, going back to school takes courage, so what does this say about me?

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#112 - 04/24/2002 10:36 AM Re: FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

Maya, what a great response and great suggestions! Yes, fear is a good topic as many of us have experienced or experienced it. Some let it overcome them and never take the first step ( to go back to school.) I think attitudes are slowly changing about what is a traditional student. :)

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#113 - 05/03/2002 08:54 AM Re: FEAR
MamaLoca Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 04/28/2002
Loc: Upstate New York
OK! OK! So now I've gone and done it.
Yesterday I quit one of my jobs. Yikes, was that ever scary after 10 years.
Today I headed over to the College and Started the rest of my life.
At 43, this is every bit as scarey as when my first husband walked out 12 years ago.
Little does he know that I he will be indirectly paying for some of this folly, lol. I'll be using some of the IRA money I got out of him from the divorce to help pay for school.
I signed up for two summer courses and got the poor ladies in admissions all in a tizzy. I had almost started this 5 years ago and now I find out that they had my middle initial wrong. So now they are having a heck of a time getting everything back together again. Wait till I tell them I took courses under my married name, lol.
I'm glad I found a place to vent and find folks who are doing or have done this.
_________________________
Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up to.

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#114 - 05/04/2002 11:14 AM Re: FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

Good for u mamaloca! :) Your sense of humor is a great asset. Wish you were in one of my "traditional" classes!! I am 47 and trying to finish an associate's degree via distance education (a couple general education credits in subjects, I ah, really don't like :) ). Distance education classes are hard in that you have to motivate yourself to do the work and it requires strong discipline. I wish you the best!

Shawna

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#115 - 05/05/2002 07:45 AM Re: FEAR
MamaLoca Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 04/28/2002
Loc: Upstate New York
Thanx for noticing me Shawna. My hat's off to you, I am looking into some online courses but I'm afraid I might not be motivated enough. A very good girl-friend of mine is graduating from a distance learning course this spring. She said there were many times she had to make herself do the work, especially the subjects that bored her. shocked

Sometimes I wonder if this is such a good idea at my age. I asked my Dad the other day "What if I'm making a mistake quiting my job and going to school?" all he said was "What if you make a mistake by NOT doing it?" He's a smart cookie. That's when I tried to talk him into paying for school. I didn't get such a good answer to that one, lol.
_________________________
Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up to.

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#116 - 05/05/2002 11:30 AM Re: FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

Your Dad was absolutely right. Given the life expectancy these days, you may have many years ahead of you to celebrate your degree.

I am glad to hear others have trouble with distance education classes. Sometimes the interaction with the professor is almost nonexistent except for at exam time.... :)

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#117 - 05/05/2002 15:45 PM Re: FEAR
gracie Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 05/05/2002
Loc: san jose, ca.
hi everyone,
i have gone back to school after almost ten years.
yeah its true you have courage going back and in actuality i feel confidence i didn't have when i quit as a junior before. the confidence i was looking for i didn't see in myself then but i still get moments of fear and that running away from school will actually solve it but then i get back into a reality mode. i feel smarter going back as that how much more horrible would it be not to have come back. it feels lonely sometimes to feel as though i went back with nothing much to show for the time i took off, at least some of you have started families! i just have myself and a new car a cat and living with my mom! how worse could anyone feel? its hard but satisfaction in trying and relearning some skills is helpful and knowing that in a few short years there will be something newer about me and challenging that the world will see :rolleyes: :rolleyes: . hang in there.
_________________________
gracie

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#118 - 05/24/2002 12:26 PM Re: FEAR
non-trad counselor Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 05/24/2002
Loc: South Dakota
Wendy,
Don't spend a single minute worrying about your age and going back to school. So you're 33 and may take 4 years to earn a degree that will allow you to earn a better living for your family. In four years you'll be 37 with or without the degree. Not only will a degree give you the knowledge you seek to get a better job it will give you more self esteem and self respect than you can ever imagine.
Good luck, you are not alone. We have over 36% of non-trad students on our campus, many over 40!!!!

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#119 - 06/04/2002 12:25 PM Re: FEAR
dprrauch Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 06/04/2002
Hi guys,
Everyone's words were like a breath of fresh air to me. I am a stay-at-home mom of 4(ages 12, 6, 3.5, and 4 months),returning to school after ten years. It was something that I had been thinking about for quite a while, and after talking to some friends (both newly enrolled in distance learning courses), I decided to bite the bullet. Upon receipt of my first syllabus, I was totally convinced that I had lost my mind, and was waaay out of my league. But I beleive that strong determination and with God's help, I will survive.

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#120 - 06/04/2002 14:23 PM Re: FEAR
Anonymous
Unregistered

dp, I doubt you are way out of your league. It is probably something you just need to get acclimated to - many things seem hard at first, but get easier as time goes by and you know what to expect.

Good luck to you! :)

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#121 - 06/06/2002 17:58 PM Re: FEAR
mom Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 06/06/2002
Loc: Montana
Wendy,

Hang in there you will do okay. I separated from my spouse in November and started school in January. I just finished my first semester (15 credits) with a 3.8 GPA. Not bad after a 29 year absence from education plus the fact that I had to work full-time (graveyard) and still find time for my two girls. It is scarey but there are a lot of older students these days and the young people have been really nice to me. I want so much to have earning power. $8/hr. can't support a family. Best wishes to you. Just hang in there. WE CAN DO IT!!! :D :D :D

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#122 - 06/09/2002 20:54 PM Re: FEAR
school1024 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 06/09/2002
Loc: Ohio
Don't worry. You'll find after a few months that you've made the best decision of your life. Some suggestions tho:
Community colleges tend to cater more to non-traditional students, so you might begin at a 2-year school where there are lots of adults returning to pick up new job skills, while raising a family and working full time.
Also, get involved in campus groups. Many schools have support groups for adult/retruning to school learners to address how scary returning to school is.
You'll make it and do well! Good luck.

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#123 - 06/11/2002 21:54 PM Re: FEAR
Biggie Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 06/11/2002
Loc: New York
I'm 24, i went to college when i was 17 and failed, i didn't have any money to pay for college and till this day i still have to pay back loans for that year. I'm afraid of going back to college because i know i'll have to start from the bottom again and i'm not sure how i can handle academic pressure rigth now. I was a very good student in high school but i messed up in collge, i probably should not have went to such a good school, the academic pressure was too much for me at that time plus the money issue, i still don't have any money to go back except for the military GI bill. Getting loans are really hard right now, i just got out of the military and am currently unemployed, i don't know what to do.

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#124 - 06/13/2002 15:34 PM Re: FEAR
Admin Offline

Member

Registered: 12/10/2008
Loc: California
Hi Biggie:

Make an appointment with your college to receive some counseling and academic support. Don't go it alone. Most importantly, don't be discouraged. Other students have felt overwhelmed at times or needed assistance in achieving their goals. They did it and so can you. :)
_________________________
Back to College
http://www.back2college.com

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